Post by Admin on Oct 20, 2022 11:08:10 GMT -5
1. Glizzy Gobblers (6-0) +0
104-94.5 Win over Mickey Mouse Club (2-4)
6 weeks, 6 wins for the Gluz man as Christian dispatched Andy en route to one of the finest starts to a season we have seen in SAMBC. Lamar (16) had a 3rd straight iffy week, but Mandrews (22) and Kenneth Walker (19) helped make up for it. Najee (12) had an alright day and my sweet prince JJ (15.5) was good but couldn’t make it 3 straight weeks of 20+. Christian will face off with John in a true clash of the titans, although both teams will be without their star wideouts.
2. How Do You Turn This on? (4-2) +0
110.5-57 Win over MaKamaraka Great Again (2-4)
In a matchup that was really never in doubt, John easily defeated the commissioner this week, with Patty Ice (25), CMC (18.5), Diggs (27.5) and Kelce (16.5) all pitching in nicely. CeeDee Lamb (8.5) has struggled a bit and Melvin Gordon (0) was a nonfactor, but he is on the Broncos so we will give him a break. With the most points in the league and a 4-2 record, he’ll try to know off the top dog in Week 7.
3. It’s Not About The Mooney (3-3) +2
82-68 Win over Jolly Rodgers (2-4)
Despite the low point total, Rob was able to sneak away with a victory this week due to his opponent being without 3 of his best players. Justin Herbert (10) had his worst week of the season but both Lenny (20) and Saquon (18.5) picked up the slack. And if you think he was lucky with BYE weeks in Week 6, just wait till he gets to play LiMonta in Week 7 when he has no Josh Allen OR Cooper Kupp. The rich get richer.
4. Dirty D (4-2) -1
78-131.5 Loss to Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (2-4)
Since his insanely hot start, Mike’s team has been crashing the last 2 weeks. With only 159.5 points scored over the last 2 weeks, Mike isn’t even averaging 80 per week over that span. Questions at WR are also apparent, with Garret Wilson (0.5) and Russel Gage (3) being non factors. To make matters worse, Mike will also not have Dalvin this week, so naturally he will probably beat me by less than 10 points. Mike acquired Matt Ryan and CEH to fill the void left by Jalen Hurts and Dalvin in Week 7, but will it be enough? Probably.
5. Drake’s New Favorite Team (3-3) -1
89.5-106 Loss to #1 Ice Cream Fan
(3-3)
Once battling for the top spot in the division, LiMonta now finds himself at .500 with a tough matchup on the way. Josh Allen (31.5) was pleasant as always and Cooper Kupp (12.5) was fine, but he will go to war without the both of them in Week 7 to be replaced by the likes of Jimmy Garoppolo and Juju Smith-Schuster. I’d offer you Russel Wilson but I’m trying to be a nicer person of late and wouldn’t want to do that to my friend. Aaron Jones (4.5) continues to get no carries and to make matter worse AJ Dillon (8) isn’t doing much either. The Packers offense looks like a slightly more capable version of the Broncos right now. Week 7 will be a test to see if this roster is as top-heavy as it seems.
6. #1 Ice Cream Fan (3-3) +3
106-89.5 Win over Drake’s New Favorite Team (3-3)
Listen, we really have to give credit where credit is due. We all counted Drew out at the beginning of the season. We all talked about how his team was poorly constructed, how he couldn’t win a championship without someone else running his team, how he made bad trades every year, how his keepers haven’t been good since Todd Gurley’s knees worked, how he isn’t good at golf, how he simps so hard for anyone who gives him attention, how we all secretly don’t like him but we can’t kick him out of the league because it would be awkward. I lost my train of thought.
Anyway, CHODE BOWL IS THIS WEEK WHO’S READY FOR THE BATTLE OF THE BASTARDS? YOUR PRECIOUS CENTIMETERS ARE ON THE LINE BOYS.
7. Burrows Burgers (3-3) +0
85.5-53.5 Win over Jesus At Red Rocks (2-4)
At 3-3 with the 6th most points scored and 8th most points against, the emotion this team inspires the most in me is boredom. Channeling all of Rob’s teams up to 2021, this team has never really made the noise to convince anyone it's a contender but hasn’t shat the bed like, well, mine. Joe Burrow (38) took a big step forward and Chris Godwin (12) might finally be coming around? Other than that though, this roster was a snoozefest despite the “win”. If you had told me the Classic Bowl would have a combined score of 139, I would have just canceled the matchup of the week. We’ll see if he can best his little brother who is back at full strength in Week 7.
8. Mickey Mouse Club (2-4) -2
94.5-104 Loss to Glizzy Gobblers (6-0)
What happened to you? Long gone are the days of Andy perennially fighting for top scorer and holding a #2 or #3 seed. Instead, we have this dried husk of a roster who have dropped 4 straight matchup and barely kept their head above the 100 points per week water mark. You make me sick.
On the bright side, Michael Pittman (22) showed some signs of life and DeVonta Smith (12.5) is having a quietly productive season. Truly, Andy’s chances at greatness were cripple by the early season losses of Javonte and Cordarrelle, but the rest of this roster has been tough to watch. With the 2nd lowest playoff% prediction (haha, beat you!) it’s all but guaranteed Andy will be selling whatever assets he has left at the deadline. He’ll get a chance to put a little distance between himself and last place when he plays Frank in Week 7.
9. Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (2-4) +3
131.5-78 Win over Dirty D (4-2)
After a month straight of eating L’s Frank finally came out with a Win, and a convincing one at that. Ja’Marr Chase (32.5) led the team in scoring with Rhamonstre Stevenson (23) continuing his breakout season. Gabe Davis (14) was solid again and even George Kittle (12) is starting to get up to speed. With the Win and the healthy point total, Frank clawed his was out of 12th place all the way to 11th. I think I speak for all of us when I say how proud of you we are. Frank will take on Andy without Gabe or AJB this week, but it looks like he’ll have a little reinforcement with D’Andre Swift set to return.
10. Jolly Rodgers (2-4) -1
68-82 Loss to It’s Not About The Mooney (3-3)
Fun Fact: Aaron Rodgers has so far averaged 1 fewer point per week than DangeRuss Wilson. The Rodge (13) was disappointing yet again and the dynamic duo of Tevin Coleman (0) and Jerrick McKinnon (3.5) did exactly what you thought those 2 people would do. Kyle Pitts (8.5) finally scored a touchdown and Jaylen Waddle (15.5) did well despite the injury concerns. It was going to be tough sledding for this team regardless due to all of the BYE weeks, but man this was a tough one. The funny part is you still outscored 2 other teams this week. What a fun game we play. It would be quite entertaining to see Steve knock off his brother in Week 7.
11. MaKamaraka Great Again (2-4) -1
57-110.5 Loss to How Do You Turn This On? (4-2)
Who is he?
A railroad track toward hell?
Breaking like a stick of furniture?
The hope that suddenly overflows the cesspool?
The love that goes down the drain like spit?
The love that said forever, forever
and then runs you over like a truck?
Are you a prayer that floats into a radio advertisement?
Despair
12. Jesus At Red Rocks (2-4) -1
53.5-85.5 Loss to Burrow’s Burgers (3-3)
In a world where my team is an absolute garbage fire, I am happy to know that Dan’s team also exists. The QB carousel fell on Carson Wentz (4) this week who promptly got injured and Jeff Wilson (0) inexplicably fell off the map. Tyler Higbee’s (0.5) targets evaporated and WR12 Mike Williams (2) swung back on the pendulum yet again. Dan will try his hand against Drew’s hot squad this week, in what could very well be a ChodeBowl for the ages.
104-94.5 Win over Mickey Mouse Club (2-4)
6 weeks, 6 wins for the Gluz man as Christian dispatched Andy en route to one of the finest starts to a season we have seen in SAMBC. Lamar (16) had a 3rd straight iffy week, but Mandrews (22) and Kenneth Walker (19) helped make up for it. Najee (12) had an alright day and my sweet prince JJ (15.5) was good but couldn’t make it 3 straight weeks of 20+. Christian will face off with John in a true clash of the titans, although both teams will be without their star wideouts.
2. How Do You Turn This on? (4-2) +0
110.5-57 Win over MaKamaraka Great Again (2-4)
In a matchup that was really never in doubt, John easily defeated the commissioner this week, with Patty Ice (25), CMC (18.5), Diggs (27.5) and Kelce (16.5) all pitching in nicely. CeeDee Lamb (8.5) has struggled a bit and Melvin Gordon (0) was a nonfactor, but he is on the Broncos so we will give him a break. With the most points in the league and a 4-2 record, he’ll try to know off the top dog in Week 7.
3. It’s Not About The Mooney (3-3) +2
82-68 Win over Jolly Rodgers (2-4)
Despite the low point total, Rob was able to sneak away with a victory this week due to his opponent being without 3 of his best players. Justin Herbert (10) had his worst week of the season but both Lenny (20) and Saquon (18.5) picked up the slack. And if you think he was lucky with BYE weeks in Week 6, just wait till he gets to play LiMonta in Week 7 when he has no Josh Allen OR Cooper Kupp. The rich get richer.
4. Dirty D (4-2) -1
78-131.5 Loss to Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (2-4)
Since his insanely hot start, Mike’s team has been crashing the last 2 weeks. With only 159.5 points scored over the last 2 weeks, Mike isn’t even averaging 80 per week over that span. Questions at WR are also apparent, with Garret Wilson (0.5) and Russel Gage (3) being non factors. To make matters worse, Mike will also not have Dalvin this week, so naturally he will probably beat me by less than 10 points. Mike acquired Matt Ryan and CEH to fill the void left by Jalen Hurts and Dalvin in Week 7, but will it be enough? Probably.
5. Drake’s New Favorite Team (3-3) -1
89.5-106 Loss to #1 Ice Cream Fan
(3-3)Once battling for the top spot in the division, LiMonta now finds himself at .500 with a tough matchup on the way. Josh Allen (31.5) was pleasant as always and Cooper Kupp (12.5) was fine, but he will go to war without the both of them in Week 7 to be replaced by the likes of Jimmy Garoppolo and Juju Smith-Schuster. I’d offer you Russel Wilson but I’m trying to be a nicer person of late and wouldn’t want to do that to my friend. Aaron Jones (4.5) continues to get no carries and to make matter worse AJ Dillon (8) isn’t doing much either. The Packers offense looks like a slightly more capable version of the Broncos right now. Week 7 will be a test to see if this roster is as top-heavy as it seems.
6. #1 Ice Cream Fan
(3-3) +3106-89.5 Win over Drake’s New Favorite Team (3-3)
Listen, we really have to give credit where credit is due. We all counted Drew out at the beginning of the season. We all talked about how his team was poorly constructed, how he couldn’t win a championship without someone else running his team, how he made bad trades every year, how his keepers haven’t been good since Todd Gurley’s knees worked, how he isn’t good at golf, how he simps so hard for anyone who gives him attention, how we all secretly don’t like him but we can’t kick him out of the league because it would be awkward. I lost my train of thought.
Anyway, CHODE BOWL IS THIS WEEK WHO’S READY FOR THE BATTLE OF THE BASTARDS? YOUR PRECIOUS CENTIMETERS ARE ON THE LINE BOYS.
7. Burrows Burgers (3-3) +0
85.5-53.5 Win over Jesus At Red Rocks (2-4)
At 3-3 with the 6th most points scored and 8th most points against, the emotion this team inspires the most in me is boredom. Channeling all of Rob’s teams up to 2021, this team has never really made the noise to convince anyone it's a contender but hasn’t shat the bed like, well, mine. Joe Burrow (38) took a big step forward and Chris Godwin (12) might finally be coming around? Other than that though, this roster was a snoozefest despite the “win”. If you had told me the Classic Bowl would have a combined score of 139, I would have just canceled the matchup of the week. We’ll see if he can best his little brother who is back at full strength in Week 7.
8. Mickey Mouse Club (2-4) -2
94.5-104 Loss to Glizzy Gobblers (6-0)
What happened to you? Long gone are the days of Andy perennially fighting for top scorer and holding a #2 or #3 seed. Instead, we have this dried husk of a roster who have dropped 4 straight matchup and barely kept their head above the 100 points per week water mark. You make me sick.
On the bright side, Michael Pittman (22) showed some signs of life and DeVonta Smith (12.5) is having a quietly productive season. Truly, Andy’s chances at greatness were cripple by the early season losses of Javonte and Cordarrelle, but the rest of this roster has been tough to watch. With the 2nd lowest playoff% prediction (haha, beat you!) it’s all but guaranteed Andy will be selling whatever assets he has left at the deadline. He’ll get a chance to put a little distance between himself and last place when he plays Frank in Week 7.
9. Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (2-4) +3
131.5-78 Win over Dirty D (4-2)
After a month straight of eating L’s Frank finally came out with a Win, and a convincing one at that. Ja’Marr Chase (32.5) led the team in scoring with Rhamonstre Stevenson (23) continuing his breakout season. Gabe Davis (14) was solid again and even George Kittle (12) is starting to get up to speed. With the Win and the healthy point total, Frank clawed his was out of 12th place all the way to 11th. I think I speak for all of us when I say how proud of you we are. Frank will take on Andy without Gabe or AJB this week, but it looks like he’ll have a little reinforcement with D’Andre Swift set to return.
10. Jolly Rodgers (2-4) -1
68-82 Loss to It’s Not About The Mooney (3-3)
Fun Fact: Aaron Rodgers has so far averaged 1 fewer point per week than DangeRuss Wilson. The Rodge (13) was disappointing yet again and the dynamic duo of Tevin Coleman (0) and Jerrick McKinnon (3.5) did exactly what you thought those 2 people would do. Kyle Pitts (8.5) finally scored a touchdown and Jaylen Waddle (15.5) did well despite the injury concerns. It was going to be tough sledding for this team regardless due to all of the BYE weeks, but man this was a tough one. The funny part is you still outscored 2 other teams this week. What a fun game we play. It would be quite entertaining to see Steve knock off his brother in Week 7.
11. MaKamaraka Great Again (2-4) -1
57-110.5 Loss to How Do You Turn This On? (4-2)
Who is he?
A railroad track toward hell?
Breaking like a stick of furniture?
The hope that suddenly overflows the cesspool?
The love that goes down the drain like spit?
The love that said forever, forever
and then runs you over like a truck?
Are you a prayer that floats into a radio advertisement?
Despair
12. Jesus At Red Rocks (2-4) -1
53.5-85.5 Loss to Burrow’s Burgers (3-3)
In a world where my team is an absolute garbage fire, I am happy to know that Dan’s team also exists. The QB carousel fell on Carson Wentz (4) this week who promptly got injured and Jeff Wilson (0) inexplicably fell off the map. Tyler Higbee’s (0.5) targets evaporated and WR12 Mike Williams (2) swung back on the pendulum yet again. Dan will try his hand against Drew’s hot squad this week, in what could very well be a ChodeBowl for the ages.