Post by Admin on Sept 21, 2022 11:42:54 GMT -5
1. How Do You Turn This On? (2-0) +0
163.5-116 Win over Burrow’s Burgers (0-2)
Going into Monday night, it actually looked like Johnny O might pull this one off. But the betrayal of his own brother’s trade of Stefon Diggs to Labeck changed everything. Diggs went OFF on monday night, collecting 148 yards and 3 TD totalling 42 points. The Bills D/ST kicking in 22 and Bass’ 12 only made things worse.
This squad saw a “down” week from Mahomes (20.5) and Kelce (7.5) but was still able to handily win again in Week 2. In the early going, it’s fairly clear that this will be the team to beat in the NBPL. And in week 3, Mikey D will look to do just that as he protects his own 2-0 record.
2. Glizzy Gobblers (2-0) +1
134.5-94 Win over Jolly Rodgers (1-1)
Even without any heroics from Justin Jefferson (7), Christian was still able to come out on top of the Melvins in the early going.
Lamar Jackson (51) had an insane week while Mark Andrews (23) was a direct beneficiary. Allen Robinson (13) finally had himself a decent week and the 49ers D/ST (13) contributed nicely as well. While Christian’s squad is in an excellent position, the running back room is starting to become a concern. Najee Haris (11.5) is already battling injuries and ineffectiveness, while Rashaad Penny (1) is a borderline non-factor. Luckily the Glizzers are loaded up with handcuffs, which may see more playing time than we expect.
3. Mickey Mouse Club (2-0) +1
123-121.5 Win over Clean D
(0-2)
It’s only Week 2 and we already have our Drewperbowl winner. Andy’s 2nd win came down to the wire of the Cardinals/Raiders game, where Kyler Murray (28) pulled out an insane 2pt conversion to send the game to OT and eventually, the points he needed to win it.
Amon-Ra St. Brown (36) is looking like a star and Gerald Everett (10) has been a diamond in the shit mountain that has been 2022 TEs so far. Javonte Williams’ (9.5) usage in the passing game disappeared as the Broncos continue to suck, and Cordarrelle Patterson (5) came back down to earth hard. Andy will open Michael Pittman back with open arms and spread cheeks when he takes on the 0-2 Rob in Week 3.
4. Dirty D (2-0) +2
114-99.5 Win over It’s Not About The Mooney (0-2)
Another huge beneficiary of Monday Night, Mikey D got an excellent performance out of Jalen Hurts (39) who walked all over the Vikings and is now quietly a top 5 fantasy QB. Rashod Bateman (22) lived up to the price Mike paid over the offseason and Darren Waller (14) may be coming back around. Even Miles Sanders (10.5) is looking like a competent RB. What a world.
While this team is definitely on a hot streak, Mike will definitely need to see more production out of Dalvin Cook (4) and Zeke (6.5) both of whom he spent a lot of draft capital on. He’s going to need all the help he can get when 1st place John comes to play this week. It’s gonna be a tough one, it’s gonna be wet and wild, it’s gonna be the MATCHUP OF THE WEEK
5. Drake’s New Favorite Team (1-1) +2
157-81.5 Win over MaKamaraka Great Again (0-2)
You know, it’s kind of in bad taste to beat up on the disabled.
In a result everyone saw coming a mile away, LiMonta walked away from Week 2 with his first win that came after a crushing 75.5 margin of victory. Josh Allen (35) and Aaron Jones (33) balled out on MNF while Cooper Kupp (28) did Cooper Kupp things. If LiMonta had just played these 3, he still would have beaten me by 14.5 points. While JuJu (2.5) looks like he might be cooked, this team still has the likes of Christian Kirk (22) and Drake London (20) to pair with Kupp if need be. In Week 3, he’ll look to get a win over Steve and establish himself as a top team in the Melvins.
6. Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (1-1) -5
49-91.5 Loss to Jesus at Red Rocks (1-1)
This one was tough to watch. Nothing seemed to go right for Frank in Week 2, most notably losing Trey Lance (2) for the year. Add that to Mike Evans’ (7.5) suspension, a down week for Ja’Marr (7.5) and AJB (8.5), a goose egg from the Colts and 1 point from your kicker and what your left with is basically a free win for Dan.
But dare I say, it appears to be Tua Time for Frank! With what he has invested in this season, Frank can’t afford to sit and cry about Lance, he’s built a win now team and dropped a nice chunk of change of Tua ($16) in order to compete. And after the week Tua just had, it just might be worth every penny. Good thing you didn’t tip any of those stripper in FAAB. Frank will have a tough assignment in Week 3 against Christian.
7. Jolly Rodgers (1-1) -2
94-134.5 Loss to Glizzy Gobblers (2-0)
With Jaylen Waddle (37) appearing to be on a true breakout and Aaron Rodgers (17) slightly improved, there are some strong elements to this team. Unfortunately, the likes of Derrick Henry (9), Kyle Pitts (2) and DK Metcalf (5) have yet to make a true impact. Steve may also be without Jerry Jeudy (1.5) who suffered a rib injury this week. For what it’s worth, he’s projected to win over LiMonta in Week 3, but as I saw this past week, Josh Allen cares little for our silly mortal mathematics. At 1-1 with multiple teams behind him, there’s still plenty of time for Steve’s team to go on a roll.
8. Jesus At Red Rocks (1-1) +4
91.5-49 Win over KeepMyPhamily’sNameOutYoMouth (1-1)
Much improved from Week 1, Dan saw a nice performance from Stafford (20) and future top-12 receiver Mike Williams (23), who combined nearly would have been enough to overcome the injury and suspension-hampered Frank. Joe Mixon (9.5) had some tough sledding as the Bengals offense as a whole is struggling, and Robert Tonyan (2) only mustered 2 targets.
The $75 Man himself Jeff Wilson (11) was effective, and seems to have a hold on the San Fran backfield as long as his health holds up. Dan currently has the lowest points scored in the league, but he has the pleasure of facing the team with the 2nd lowest points in the league and may be without their best player in Week 3. Fun fact, mine and Dan’s points scored combined is only 13.5 more than John’s so far on the season. Balanced!
9. It’s Not About The Mooney (0-2) -1
99.5-114 Loss to Dirty D (2-0)
Rob dropped the ball again this week despite some a good performance from Justin Herbert (28.5), and decent showings from Saquon (11.5), Deebo (11.5) and Pat Freiermuth (10). It appears team namesake Darnell Mooney (0.5) is unplayable at this point, but the trio of Terry McLaurin (9), Jahan Dotson (15), and JD McKissic (8.5) could be a nice play. Leave it to Rob to invest as much as possible in the Commies’ offense. Rob is 0-2, but may just have the most talented roster of all the 0-2 teams. Congrats on being the coolest guy at Shenanigans. He will get no reprieve against Andy in Week 3.
10. Burrow’s Burgers (0-2) +0
116-163.5 Loss to How Do You Turn This On? (2-0)
John put up a respectable 116 in Week 2, but it was no use against the buzzwsaw. Joe Burrow (17) was ok despite the collapse of the Bengals’ offense, and Nick Chubb (30.5) is solidly RB1 now that Jonathan Taylor (5.5) decided to have a down week. “WR1” Allen Lazard (8) has yet to live up to his billing while Dawson Knox (6) still isn’t carving out his role in Buffalo. John is perfectly average at 6th in points scored, but he’ll have to get more consistent production if he wants to compete in his top-heavy division. He’ll get to square up with fellow 0-2 team Drew in Week 3.
11. Clean D (0-2) +0
121.5-123 Loss to Mickey Mouse Club (2-0)
It looked like No Dak No Problem for Drew, but in a cruel twist of fate he fell by a mere 1.5 on the Drewperbowl superstage. Tyreek Hill (42) put all the Week 1 doubt to rest while Tee Higgins (16) and Derek Carr (20) both pitched in. Dalton Schultz (0) didn’t help matters and Austin Ekeler (13.5) was fine but once again was not up to par with his 1st round selection. Drew will shoot his shot at Win #1 in Week 3 against Johnny O.
12. MaKamaraka Great Again (0-2) -3
81.5-157 Loss to Drake’s New Favorite Team (1-1)
BRONCOS COUNTRY, LET’S CRY
This matchup was basically over before it began. I already was a longshot to win in Week 2 and lost Alvin Kamara to injury for the week. Mark Ingram (6) filled in and did exactly as good as you’d think Mark Ingram would do in 2022. Marquise Brown (9) continues to professionally string me along and Kareem Hunt (8) took a back seat to Chubb. TJ Hockenson (3.5) is pulling off the rare feat of being the worst offensive player on the Lions and the Browns D/ST (0) simply couldn’t handle the juggernaut Jets.
James Robinson (16) was once again a bright spot, and before you say it I do understand how sad it is that someone scoring 16 is a bright spot. Courtland Sutton (18) salvaged a very bad day from the Broncos and especially QB15 Russell Wilson (11) who once again looks as if he forgot how to play football. This weird dork is too caught up in building his own brand of being some sort of Carlton Banks/Jesus Freak/Wellness Guru that he is too far up his own ass to actually play well against THE TEXANS. Thanks for nothing you insufferable corn ball. The Commish will try his luck against Dan in Week 3.
163.5-116 Win over Burrow’s Burgers (0-2)
Going into Monday night, it actually looked like Johnny O might pull this one off. But the betrayal of his own brother’s trade of Stefon Diggs to Labeck changed everything. Diggs went OFF on monday night, collecting 148 yards and 3 TD totalling 42 points. The Bills D/ST kicking in 22 and Bass’ 12 only made things worse.
This squad saw a “down” week from Mahomes (20.5) and Kelce (7.5) but was still able to handily win again in Week 2. In the early going, it’s fairly clear that this will be the team to beat in the NBPL. And in week 3, Mikey D will look to do just that as he protects his own 2-0 record.
2. Glizzy Gobblers (2-0) +1
134.5-94 Win over Jolly Rodgers (1-1)
Even without any heroics from Justin Jefferson (7), Christian was still able to come out on top of the Melvins in the early going.
Lamar Jackson (51) had an insane week while Mark Andrews (23) was a direct beneficiary. Allen Robinson (13) finally had himself a decent week and the 49ers D/ST (13) contributed nicely as well. While Christian’s squad is in an excellent position, the running back room is starting to become a concern. Najee Haris (11.5) is already battling injuries and ineffectiveness, while Rashaad Penny (1) is a borderline non-factor. Luckily the Glizzers are loaded up with handcuffs, which may see more playing time than we expect.
3. Mickey Mouse Club (2-0) +1
123-121.5 Win over Clean D
(0-2)It’s only Week 2 and we already have our Drewperbowl winner. Andy’s 2nd win came down to the wire of the Cardinals/Raiders game, where Kyler Murray (28) pulled out an insane 2pt conversion to send the game to OT and eventually, the points he needed to win it.
Amon-Ra St. Brown (36) is looking like a star and Gerald Everett (10) has been a diamond in the shit mountain that has been 2022 TEs so far. Javonte Williams’ (9.5) usage in the passing game disappeared as the Broncos continue to suck, and Cordarrelle Patterson (5) came back down to earth hard. Andy will open Michael Pittman back with open arms and spread cheeks when he takes on the 0-2 Rob in Week 3.
4. Dirty D (2-0) +2
114-99.5 Win over It’s Not About The Mooney (0-2)
Another huge beneficiary of Monday Night, Mikey D got an excellent performance out of Jalen Hurts (39) who walked all over the Vikings and is now quietly a top 5 fantasy QB. Rashod Bateman (22) lived up to the price Mike paid over the offseason and Darren Waller (14) may be coming back around. Even Miles Sanders (10.5) is looking like a competent RB. What a world.
While this team is definitely on a hot streak, Mike will definitely need to see more production out of Dalvin Cook (4) and Zeke (6.5) both of whom he spent a lot of draft capital on. He’s going to need all the help he can get when 1st place John comes to play this week. It’s gonna be a tough one, it’s gonna be wet and wild, it’s gonna be the MATCHUP OF THE WEEK
5. Drake’s New Favorite Team (1-1) +2
157-81.5 Win over MaKamaraka Great Again (0-2)
You know, it’s kind of in bad taste to beat up on the disabled.
In a result everyone saw coming a mile away, LiMonta walked away from Week 2 with his first win that came after a crushing 75.5 margin of victory. Josh Allen (35) and Aaron Jones (33) balled out on MNF while Cooper Kupp (28) did Cooper Kupp things. If LiMonta had just played these 3, he still would have beaten me by 14.5 points. While JuJu (2.5) looks like he might be cooked, this team still has the likes of Christian Kirk (22) and Drake London (20) to pair with Kupp if need be. In Week 3, he’ll look to get a win over Steve and establish himself as a top team in the Melvins.
6. Keep My Phamily’s Name Out Yo Mouth (1-1) -5
49-91.5 Loss to Jesus at Red Rocks (1-1)
This one was tough to watch. Nothing seemed to go right for Frank in Week 2, most notably losing Trey Lance (2) for the year. Add that to Mike Evans’ (7.5) suspension, a down week for Ja’Marr (7.5) and AJB (8.5), a goose egg from the Colts and 1 point from your kicker and what your left with is basically a free win for Dan.
But dare I say, it appears to be Tua Time for Frank! With what he has invested in this season, Frank can’t afford to sit and cry about Lance, he’s built a win now team and dropped a nice chunk of change of Tua ($16) in order to compete. And after the week Tua just had, it just might be worth every penny. Good thing you didn’t tip any of those stripper in FAAB. Frank will have a tough assignment in Week 3 against Christian.
7. Jolly Rodgers (1-1) -2
94-134.5 Loss to Glizzy Gobblers (2-0)
With Jaylen Waddle (37) appearing to be on a true breakout and Aaron Rodgers (17) slightly improved, there are some strong elements to this team. Unfortunately, the likes of Derrick Henry (9), Kyle Pitts (2) and DK Metcalf (5) have yet to make a true impact. Steve may also be without Jerry Jeudy (1.5) who suffered a rib injury this week. For what it’s worth, he’s projected to win over LiMonta in Week 3, but as I saw this past week, Josh Allen cares little for our silly mortal mathematics. At 1-1 with multiple teams behind him, there’s still plenty of time for Steve’s team to go on a roll.
8. Jesus At Red Rocks (1-1) +4
91.5-49 Win over KeepMyPhamily’sNameOutYoMouth (1-1)
Much improved from Week 1, Dan saw a nice performance from Stafford (20) and future top-12 receiver Mike Williams (23), who combined nearly would have been enough to overcome the injury and suspension-hampered Frank. Joe Mixon (9.5) had some tough sledding as the Bengals offense as a whole is struggling, and Robert Tonyan (2) only mustered 2 targets.
The $75 Man himself Jeff Wilson (11) was effective, and seems to have a hold on the San Fran backfield as long as his health holds up. Dan currently has the lowest points scored in the league, but he has the pleasure of facing the team with the 2nd lowest points in the league and may be without their best player in Week 3. Fun fact, mine and Dan’s points scored combined is only 13.5 more than John’s so far on the season. Balanced!
9. It’s Not About The Mooney (0-2) -1
99.5-114 Loss to Dirty D (2-0)
Rob dropped the ball again this week despite some a good performance from Justin Herbert (28.5), and decent showings from Saquon (11.5), Deebo (11.5) and Pat Freiermuth (10). It appears team namesake Darnell Mooney (0.5) is unplayable at this point, but the trio of Terry McLaurin (9), Jahan Dotson (15), and JD McKissic (8.5) could be a nice play. Leave it to Rob to invest as much as possible in the Commies’ offense. Rob is 0-2, but may just have the most talented roster of all the 0-2 teams. Congrats on being the coolest guy at Shenanigans. He will get no reprieve against Andy in Week 3.
10. Burrow’s Burgers (0-2) +0
116-163.5 Loss to How Do You Turn This On? (2-0)
John put up a respectable 116 in Week 2, but it was no use against the buzzwsaw. Joe Burrow (17) was ok despite the collapse of the Bengals’ offense, and Nick Chubb (30.5) is solidly RB1 now that Jonathan Taylor (5.5) decided to have a down week. “WR1” Allen Lazard (8) has yet to live up to his billing while Dawson Knox (6) still isn’t carving out his role in Buffalo. John is perfectly average at 6th in points scored, but he’ll have to get more consistent production if he wants to compete in his top-heavy division. He’ll get to square up with fellow 0-2 team Drew in Week 3.
11. Clean D
(0-2) +0121.5-123 Loss to Mickey Mouse Club (2-0)
It looked like No Dak No Problem for Drew, but in a cruel twist of fate he fell by a mere 1.5 on the Drewperbowl superstage. Tyreek Hill (42) put all the Week 1 doubt to rest while Tee Higgins (16) and Derek Carr (20) both pitched in. Dalton Schultz (0) didn’t help matters and Austin Ekeler (13.5) was fine but once again was not up to par with his 1st round selection. Drew will shoot his shot at Win #1 in Week 3 against Johnny O.
12. MaKamaraka Great Again (0-2) -3
81.5-157 Loss to Drake’s New Favorite Team (1-1)
BRONCOS COUNTRY, LET’S CRY
This matchup was basically over before it began. I already was a longshot to win in Week 2 and lost Alvin Kamara to injury for the week. Mark Ingram (6) filled in and did exactly as good as you’d think Mark Ingram would do in 2022. Marquise Brown (9) continues to professionally string me along and Kareem Hunt (8) took a back seat to Chubb. TJ Hockenson (3.5) is pulling off the rare feat of being the worst offensive player on the Lions and the Browns D/ST (0) simply couldn’t handle the juggernaut Jets.
James Robinson (16) was once again a bright spot, and before you say it I do understand how sad it is that someone scoring 16 is a bright spot. Courtland Sutton (18) salvaged a very bad day from the Broncos and especially QB15 Russell Wilson (11) who once again looks as if he forgot how to play football. This weird dork is too caught up in building his own brand of being some sort of Carlton Banks/Jesus Freak/Wellness Guru that he is too far up his own ass to actually play well against THE TEXANS. Thanks for nothing you insufferable corn ball. The Commish will try his luck against Dan in Week 3.